I still check my phone first thing in the morning

which is a nasty habit, so they say

I pick up the device with the LED lit screen that’s so bright it knocks the crust of out my eyes, then all of a sudden I tap back into reality. I leave the place where I only exist to myself as a traveller to come back to be with everyone else. I can’t seriously be the only one intrigued by the process of sleeping and dreaming. We put these avatars to rest at the end of every night ceasing to exist again until we open our eyes and do this entire process all over again.

Artwork by Fritz Von Eric

So yes of course I’m guilty. What happened while I was gone? Don’t I have to plug back in? Despite knowing all the weIlness modalities and rituals I still struggle in my own journey. I don’t always meditate and practice qigong in the mornings. I don’t always wake up at 7am. I don’t always gym hard and eat boiled eggs with peanut butter rice cakes for breakfast. I know that when you lack discipline (I hate that word let’s change it) devotion there is always a price to pay. The cost could be your sanity, love, and sometimes the roof over your head. Even with all this information I still have this urge to check my phone in the morning. I am always seeking wellness but how much wellness could a wellness guru indulge in if the wellness guru lives in a capitalist society?

Oh and doesn’t my commitment to this system depends on me checking my phone in the morning so I can do what they tell me. Isn’t that why they developed the little device with a LED lite screen guaranteed for brain rotting?

Let’s play a game, you fill in the blank:

“You need to have ____ to do that____”

“You don’t have enough of this_____ to purchase that”

“You’ll loose _____ if you’re late on ______”

It’s so addicting, I’m in a rendezvous with checking my phone in the morning. It’s a nasty habit. So they say but none of this actually matters don’t we all die at the end of this anyway?

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I just launched my Done Adulting, Time for Coloring book for those moments when you need to take a pause from adulting. I see how much working and finding my way in this world takes a toll on my spirit. I stopped doing things I enjoy just to keep up in the dog race. This creation was born from a heart felt desired to stay connected to what keeps me light, childlike and free. My mind is my priority and nothing will come against it.

Thanks for reading!

with love,

Tiana